If you clicked on this article, there's a good chance you're experiencing burnout.
I am someone who deals a lot with anxiety. Sometimes I can get so overwhelmed that it stunts my normal day-to-day activity!
This can even start with small cause. Maybe you've had a disagreement with your spouse. Maybe you found out someone is slandering your name. Maybe your boss has been temperamental towards you or is making your load too heavy at work. Maybe your kids won't listen no matter how many times your tell them to do something. Or maybe you're in a grocery store and it's so crowded and you're getting over stimulated with all the bumping into people or the amount of sounds that you hear you can't even think! (Or is that just me?)
Whatever start it, it adds up. The list could go on but I'll stop there. A lot of these are stressful related situations that lead to a burnout.
You are overstimulated. Yes you want to be calm, cool, and collected in all these moments, but you're getting pushed closer and closer to a mental breakdown! Sometimes we hit a wall of losing motivation to do our normal routines. And I'm here to tell you that is OK. Because sometimes when we hit a wall, it's so that we can lean on that wall for some relief.
Of course there are so many different situations that can be causing this burnout feeling. And there's not really a one applies to all kind of answer. However, recognizing what it is that's causing this burnout and making necessary changes is where you need to start,
FIRST LET'S RECOGNIZE BURNOUT FOR WHAT IT IS
YOU NOTICE YOURSELF DISENGAGING FROM THINGS
YOU USED TO ENJOY OR APPRECIATE MORE.
YOU'RE FEELING HELPLESS OR HOPELESS.
LOSS OF EMOTIONS OR EMOTIONS ARE BLURRED.
YOU'RE SLEEPING A LOT MORE, OR YOU NOTICE WHEN YOU SHOULD BE SLEEPING YOU'RE NOT ABLE TO.
YOU'RE QUESTIONING IF THINGS ARE EVEN WORTH THE EFFORT ANYMORE.
HERE'S WHAT I DISCOVERED THAT HELPS ME
[ STEP 1 ] BOUNDARIES
I have to say this is almost always where I have to start when I feel myself getting close to a burnout, so I'm listing this first.
Whenever I feel I am being treated in a way I don't like, I have to do some awareness work. Who or what is it that is making me feel uncomfortable or hurt? Is it my family? Friends? Well I'll be the first to tell you, if you have not already set boundaries between you and the people you love that are affecting you, this will be extremely difficult to start. And it's going to take a long time for it to become normal. But you can't place boundaries with people without placing boundaries with yourself.
So I challenge you to do some self awareness work. In what ways can you give yourself more respect? How kind do you talk to yourself? Do you put yourself down or doubt yourself at the face of challenges? Are there some changes you can make? For people to respect your boundaries you have to respect your own boundaries as well. And once you know and understand the love and kindness you actually deserve, the next step would be to set those boundaries with others.
We place boundaries with people we love because we love them. And we want to continue to have that relationship with that person. But unfortunately not everyone will respect it, and it's these people we must put at a distance, at least until they can learn to show that respect. And when you do make these changes, pay attention to how much better your quality of life will get from this. It's not an easy task, but it starts with how we treat ourselves.
[ STEP 2 ] HELP FROM OTHERS
This is more easier said than done. Because not all of us have family and friends to rely on. Sometimes. our support group is only ourselves. Or maybe we do have people who could help us but we're not comfortable asking help from them.
I am definitely a person who could probably tell my whole life story to a stranger more easier before I ever sincerely express any vulnerable emotions to a family member. So if you have someone to talk to that great, if not it's a good idea to find someone. Therapy has worked well for me. I put it off for many years thinking it was too intimidating to start. But when I did finally start, it was the most relieving feeling to finally get feelings off my chest and be validated for once.
You can even start a journal. And if you have a computer there are so many outlets to express yourself and talk with other people who share similar stories. For me, I keep several different journals. I find it much easier to type journal entries as well. Sometimes therapy isn't an option but don't rule it out just yet. A lot of communities offer free therapy or therapy based on income. So before you feel like giving up, give this a try.
[ STEP 3 ] SELF CARE
Self care looks different for many people. For some people its bubble baths and relaxing with a movie with wine. For other people its making the decision to stop bad habits and replace them with healthier options.
My self care consists of putting my needs as a priority. I felt more relaxed going out and getting exercise. I started a night time skin care routine because it was a way to pamper myself and fall asleep every night more relaxed. I started saying "no" more. I changed a few unhealthy habits and replaced them with healthier habits. These changes helped me feel like I was in a little more control and having a good routine at the start and end of every day helped a lot.
Whatever your self care may be it is absolutely necessary for recovery.
Maybe you're so used to caring for others that it can feel selfish to do things for yourself. But think about it this way. You cannot pour from an empty cup. How can you help save others from going under water when you yourself are drowning? I can honestly say I know it's hard to change your thinking & to making yourself a priority, but long term it can make the world of difference. So, allow time for your batteries to recharge. Do things you genuinely enjoy, or are better for your health. Focus on yourself even if it's just for a little time each day. Find your "Me" time and create a routine that makes you feel relaxed or happy.
[ STEP 4 ] ALLOWING TIME TO FEEL AND HEAL
Understand that things don't get better over night. Have a realistic expectation.
But also at the same time, if you don't allow yourself time to grieve or process your emotions, eventually it will catch up with you. So take this time now to express those emotions so they don't come creeping up when you least want them to. And after, be gentle with yourself. Allow for mistakes to happen. You are allowed to make mistakes. View it as a learning experience. Remember that your perspective is the most powerful thing you will ever have. Allow time to feel and then work on having a different perspective. Express gratitude. These are all things that help me.
Thanks for visiting my blog! Brookeosity is pronounced like Brooke + Curiosity combined. This is my Lifestyle blog based in Oklahoma. Here you will read about my love for Oklahoma, how I navigate through life as a twenty-something-year-old, and what motivates me! I write for women like myself who have transitioned to adulthood and are still figuring their lives out.